Retirement quotes that celebrate reaching this incredible milestone in life! Help mark this special occasion with a heartfelt message wishing the lucky person all the best for the next chapter in their life, or give them some funny retirement advice!
Are you looking for a retirement quote to write in a card for a colleague or boss who is finishing up at work? Maybe you're feeling sad that you'll lose a dear friend, or incredibly jealous that you'll be turning up to work next week when they're gone!
Or perhaps you want to wish a family member, parent, or friend all the best for their retirement, and send them on their way with some retirement wisdom from those who have been there before!
Our collection includes...
On this page I've curated the best retirement quotes from around the internet and grouped them into helpful categories. You can click on each link to see a topic, or scroll down the page to read them all.
Humorous and Funny Retirement Quotes
~ Gene Perret
~ Jonathan Clements
~ Abe Lemons
~ Gene Perret
~ Author Unknown
~ Catherine Pulsifer
~ from "101 Fun Things to do in Retirement" by Stella Rheingold
~ Gene Perret
And this one-liner is rather funny, especially if you write it on a toilet seat!
If you're looking for more funny retirement ideas, do check out our Retirement Gag Gifts page.
Free Retirement Certificate Maker
Have a play on our free Retirement certificate maker and present your colleague or family member with a funny certificate celebrating this milestone achievement.
You can edit all the text on the certificate to personalize it perfectly for the lucky retiree!
On Saying Goodbye
~ Ernie Harwell
~ Paulo Coelho
~ Dr Seuss
~ from "Paper Towns" by John Green
~ from "The Return of the King" by J.R.R. Tolkien
~ Author Unknown.
On New Beginnings
~ from "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead" by Tom Stoppard
~ Lyrics from "Closing Time" by Semisonic
~ from "Little Gidding" by T.S. Eliot
~ taken from "The Prophet" by Kahlil Gibran
~ from "Leaving Everything Most Loved" by Jacqueline Winspear
More Retirement Quotes
May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane.
May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you.
And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
~ J. Lubbock
~ M.K. Soni
Retirement "Badge" Sayings
Here are some silly retirement sayings to put on a badge or sign for the retiree!
- I'm not retired - golfing is a full-time job!
- I'm not retired - knitting is a full-time job!
- I'm retired... but I work part time as a pain in the butt!
- Retired, but working part time spoiling my grandkids!
- Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth!
- Quit yer yappin and give me my damn discount!
- Retired and happy... spending my kids' inheritance!
- Senior Citizen... and Unsolicited Advice Dispenser!
- Retirement is what you do between doctor appointments.
- I'm retired. Your Not. Nah nah nah nah nah.
- Retirement: the pay sucks, but the hours are really good!
- 65 is the new... what was I saying?
And you can find many more silly retirement ideas on our retirement gag gifts page.
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I hope you enjoyed our collection of retirement quotes! And we have more ideas on our retirement wishes and card messages page.
If you're looking for a personalized retirement gift, do check out our "retirement statistics" poster generator.