Funny 50th Birthday Quotes and Sayings

50th birthday quotes and sayings to help wish someone a fabulous 50th!

Turning 50 is a milestone but it can be hard to know what to write in a card, so add a silly quote and send them over the hill with a bit of flair!

"You know you're 50 when..." 50th birthday messages

These "you know you're 50 when..." messages always make me laugh. They're funny, but they also ring true, which is slightly terrifying at the same time!

"You know you're 50 when you're in an elevator when your favorite song comes on" Anon

"You know you're 50 when getting lucky means a short wait in the doctor's office" Anon

"You know you're 50 when your back goes out more often than you do" Anon

"You know you're 50 when your back is hairier than your head" Anon

"You know you're 50 when you have a party and the neighbours don't even realise" Anon

"You know you're 50 when a kid you once babysat is now your lawyer" Anon

"You know you're 50 when someone offers you a seat on the bus. And you don't refuse." Anon

50th birthday quotes about middle age

Teasing about middle age is almost mandatory at 50, and these following quotes are gentle but funny, and sure to bring a laugh.

"Middle age is when a man has got a handle on life and life has put handles on his waist" Anon

"Old age is like underwear... it creeps up on you" Anon

"The tragedy of getting old: So many candles... so little cake" Anon

"If things get better with age then you're approaching magnificent" Anon

50th Birthday Quotes by Famous People

Famous people must know what they're talking about, right? Well here are a few of their pearls of wisdom on the big five-oh. Great to use as the feature message in a card.

"Forty is the age of youth. Fifty is the youth of old age" Victor Hugo

"The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down." T. S. Eliot

"I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry" Alan Bleasdale

"Looking fifty is great - if you're sixty" Joan Rivers

"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed" Charles Schulz

"When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old" Mark Twain

"As men get older, the toys get more expensive Marvin Davis

"Age is not important unless you're a cheese" Helen Hayes

"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter" Mark Twain

"You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime" John Grier

"A man has reached middle age when he's warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police" Henry Youngman

"Middle age is when your age starts showing around your middle" Bob Hope

"Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else" Ogden Nash

Anonymous 50th Birthday Quotes and Messages

Some more great sayings on turning 50. I particularly like the one about eating more cake!

"Fifty is an excellent age... if you're a bottle of wine" Anon

"By 50, you acquire a lot of common sense... which is good because your sense of hearing and sight are starting to go" Anon

"There are plenty of good things about being 50. Just ask any 80 year old" Anon

"When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off" Anon

"Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake" Anon

"If you haven't grown up by age 50 then you don't have to" Anon

"Fifty is five perfect tens" Anon

"FIFTY is only 14 in scrabble" Anon

50th Birthday Personalized Message Poster

And if you're looking for a really unique and memorable way to wish someone a happy 50th birthday, then do check out our 50th birthday posters . Easy to edit and print out at home, your gift will be the talk of the party!

Click here to personalize and print your poster

What next?

I hope you enjoyed these 50th birthday quotes and I hope you found one that was just right for the occasion. Here are some other pages I think you might enjoy...

50th Birthday Wishes & Messages

50th Birthday Poems

50th Birthday Jokes

100+ Happy Birthday Wishes

Printable gag gifts

Gag certificates, including the "Certified Oldie Award"

Need some ideas for how to celebrate? Check out our 50th Birthday Party Ideas.


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