Funny Thanksgiving Jokes for Kids

Last Updated: November 11, 2021

Looking for the funniest Thanksgiving jokes for kids? On this page, you'll find a huge collection of hilarious, clean jokes you can share with your friends and family this Thanksgiving! From funny turkey jokes and corny pumpkin jokes to roll-your-eyes bad dad jokes about all things Thanksgiving, there's something here for everyone's sense of humor!

thanksgiving jokes

Scroll down the page to read the full collection of kid-friendly jokes, or use these links to jump to a particular category.

Best Thanksgiving Jokes | Pumpkin Jokes | Turkey Jokes | Knock Knock Jokes | Thanksgiving Puns | Funny Quotes

Best Thanksgiving Jokes for Kids

These funny Thanksgiving jokes are so bad they're good and will keep the kids entertained through Thanksgiving dinner!

What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving? Good-pie everyone!

Which side dish tells the worst jokes? Corn(y) bread!

What happens if you eat too much at Thanksgiving? You get autumn-y ache!

Why did the turkey cross the road? Because the chicken had the day off!

Why was the Thanksgiving dinner so expensive? It had 24 carrots.

What did pilgrims use to bake cakes? May-Flour!

What's the number one key to a great Thanksgiving? A tur-key!

What is the cutest season? Awww-tumn.

Wy did the cranberries turn red? Because they saw the turkey dressing!

Why is Thanksgiving such a clever holiday? Because it is in Know-vember.

What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving? The letter G.

Which holiday is Dracula's favorite? Fangs-giving!

Funny Pumpkin Thanksgiving Jokes

Corny pumpkin jokes and puns, perfect for sharing with your friends at Thanksgiving!

What is a pumpkin's favorite sport? Squash.

What do you get when you divide a pumpkin's circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin-pi!

What's the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie? Your teeth!

What do you call a pretty pumpkin? Gourd-geous!

Who helps the little pumpkins cross the road safely? The crossing gourd.

What do you get when you drop a pumpkin from your roof? Squash!

What does a pumpkin like to read? Pulp fiction.

Funny Turkey Thanksgiving Jokes

Share these hilarious turkey-themed Thanksgiving jokes with your family and friends as you gather for your turkey feast!

Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn't a chicken!

What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving? Lucky!

What do you call a rude turkey? A jerk-ey!

Why didn't the turkey want any dessert? He was already stuffed!

What is a turkey thankful for at Thanksgiving? Vegetarians!

What do you call a running turkey? Fast food!

What does a one-legged turkey say? Wobble wobble!

Where do you find a turkey with no legs? Exactly where you left it.

Why can't you take a turkey to church? Because they use fowl language!

What did the turkey say to the hunter on Thanksgiving day? Quack, quack!

What do turkeys like to do in the summertime? Have peck-nics!

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a turkey? Enough drumsticks for everyone!

What happened to the turkey that got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

What key won't open any doors? A tur-key!

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? The turkey trot!

What does a turkey dress up as for Halloween? A gobblin'!

What is a turkey ghost called? A poultry-geist!

How did the turkey get home for Thanksgiving? She took the gravy train!

Knock Knock Thanksgiving Jokes for Kids

These knock knock Thanksgiving jokes are perfect for sharing any time on Thanksgiving day!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Butter open up quick, I have a funny Thanksgiving joke to tell you!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Gladys! Gladys who? Gladys finally Thanksgiving day!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ben! Ben who? Ben waiting for Thanksgiving all year!

Knock knock! Who's there? Phillip. Phillip who? Pillip a big plate of turkey and let's start eating!

Knock Knock Who's there? Handsome. Handsome who? Handsome gravy to me, please.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee who? Norma Lee I don't eat this much!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dishes! Dishes who? Dishes a very bad Thanksgiving joke!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Tamara. Tamara who? Tamara we'll eat all these leftovers!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Annie. Annie who? Annie body seen the turkey?

Funny Thanksgiving Puns & One-liners

And here are some funny Thanksgiving puns you can weave into your conversations over Thanksgiving dinner!

What's cookin' gourd lookin'?

Pie've been waiting all season for this!

B-autumn's up!

Let the gourd times roll!

Let's give 'em pumpkin to talk about!

Gobble 'til you wobble!

Nothing gets butter than this!

Feast your eyes on this!

'Tis the season of gourdness!

Corn you believe it?

Feast mode!

That's a-maize-ing!

Oh my gourd!

No fowl language!

More rolls? You butter believe it!

Have a gourd time this Thanksgiving!

Funny Quotes and Jokes about Thanksgiving

Share a laugh with one of these funny Thanksgiving jokes and quotes.

May your stuffing be tasty.
May your turkey plump,
may your potatoes and gravy have nary a lump.
May your yams be delicious,
and your pies take the prize,
and may your Thanksgiving dinner stay off your thighs.

Thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, one by one, as each relative goes home.
~ Melanie White

Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not coincidence.
~ Erma Bombeck

You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.
~ Jay Leno

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.
~ Jim Davis

Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be in my pants.
~ Kevin James

Don't bother counting calories today, just your blessings!

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
~ Erma Bombeck

Thanksgiving - when the people who are the most thankful are the ones who didn't have to cook.
~ Melanie White

Thanksgiving Coloring Pages for Kids & Adults

I hope you enjoyed these Thanksgiving jokes! To keep the kids busy and entertained while you prepare for the holidays, check out our Thanksgiving coloring pages for a huge range of fun pictures to color in!

thanksgiving coloring pages

More Thanksgiving Ideas

We hope you liked our collection of Thanksgiving jokes and puns. If you're looking for more Thanksgiving quotes, you may like these other pages.


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